How Do You Handle Irrationality with a User?

@ wrote:
So I'm curious to know what everyone else thinks about the subject. We all encounter users who cannot be reasoned with, no matter how hard we try. What do you do to handle those users? 
 
I wrote an article on this very topic: http://www.thanksaj.com/2014/07/encountering-irrationality-its-when-not-if/
 
Please let me know what you think of it and also we can discuss the topic in general here!
 
Thanks, 

I think that's a pretty key skill in any industry, but it is one that is often not as developed as necessary in IT folks.  By nature we're often spending more time learning how to deal with machines than with people 🙂  However it can be developed with practice, you just have to put in the time.

@ wrote:

@ wrote:
So I'm curious to know what everyone else thinks about the subject. We all encounter users who cannot be reasoned with, no matter how hard we try. What do you do to handle those users? 
 
I wrote an article on this very topic: http://www.thanksaj.com/2014/07/encountering-irrationality-its-when-not-if/
 
Please let me know what you think of it and also we can discuss the topic in general here!
 
Thanks, 

I think that's a pretty key skill in any industry, but it is one that is often not as developed as necessary in IT folks.  By nature we're often spending more time learning how to deal with machines than with people 🙂  However it can be developed with practice, you just have to put in the time.

Nic, I agree. IT people tend to be more intellectual than people-oriented, as a rule. There are, of course, exceptions, but the general rule is that IT people work on machines, not as much people. Thus the reason for the discussion. 🙂

One thing that really helped me with my socializing skills was a stint doing phone support for QuickBooks Enterprise.  Putting in 8 hours a day talking to random strangers on the phone got me to the point where I was comfortable making smalltalk with anyone.  Especially since there were often file operations that could take some time.  After a year doing that I was a pro!

Yeah, I know how that goes. Phone support breaks you of a lot of common fears people have about social interaction. Lol

I stick to my position, concessions only encourage further issues. Even if you just compromise the problem user still sees that their behavior improved the outcome even if they didn't get exactly what they wanted.

@ wrote:
I stick to my position, concessions only encourage further issues. Even if you just compromise the problem user still sees that their behavior improved the outcome even if they didn't get exactly what they wanted.

Have you seen a decrease in unreasonable requests come in from that strategy?

As long as management is willing to back you up, it works. Most users end up giving up and realizing they';re just wasting their time after a while.

@ wrote:
As long as management is willing to back you up, it works. Most users end up giving up and realizing they';re just wasting their time after a while.

You don't make many friends that way though...maybe I just like being liked by people too much. When I want, I can not care. Sometimes I have trouble not caring though...

The way I see it I go to work to make $ not friends, so if people like me, cool, if not it doesn't bother me.

@ wrote:
The way I see it I go to work to make $ not friends, so if people like me, cool, if not it doesn't bother me.

You're a more resiliant man than me then...